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[onebullet]

Hey, you've reached Shepard.
Leave a message and I'll get back to you.
☆
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Comments

[thearchangel]

I can't tell you how much I wish I were.

[onebullet]

[ The "But why?" she was going to reply with is deleted. ]

Whatever

Make sure he doesn't run circles round you and destroy everything in that case

[thearchangel]

[Just wait until he tells you this guy rolls up into a ball-]

Don't worry. The weapons are in my bag. Like hell is he getting near that.

... if I can upgrade these things they might work for you.

[onebullet]

[ Ooooh! ]

That so

No fleshy parts in the weapons is there

[thearchangel]

Not a single one.

They're not very powerful... need some upgrades, but we both know that's definitely in my wheelhouse.

[onebullet]

You know I'd never say no to adding a new gun or two to my collection

[ Her, currently, very small collection. ]

Between this and sorting weapons for the ship, am I ever going to see you again?

[ Lost in the sauce calibrations. ]

[thearchangel]

I figured you'd like that.

[... he would also like it if she had more guns. But that's him being paranoid.]

Shepard, we... live together. [Give him a second.] Oh. Right. Well, we're not exactly in a galaxy-ending war so... I think I can spare a little more time.

[onebullet]

You sure?

Prepared to swear on that?

[thearchangel]

I swear on my rifle.

How's that work?

[onebullet]

If that's the case, the calibrations can have you and I'll take the rifle now.

[thearchangel]

Ouch. Fine, I see how it is. Only like me for the size of my weapon...

[onebullet]

Thought size didn't matter

"it's all about how you pop the heat sink"

[thearchangel]

I did it again, didn't I.

[onebullet]

[ Rest assured, she is cackling away on the other end of the phone. ]

Did what again? I thought we were talking about your weapon.

[thearchangel]

[At least he can still make her laugh!!]

My rifle, at least. I swear on - I will take breaks from this project.

But just for you.

[onebullet]

[ She dithers on whether to push for more, so there's a small delay before her next reply. ]

For yourself too

We're not up against Reapers any more, remember?

[thearchangel]

Hah, hold on now... one thing at a time.

[He's still always got some project he's working on in the background... one way or another.]

It's hard to believe, I think.

[onebullet]

I've been here nine months

Still feels like it's a dream, and I'll wake up on the Normandy any second

[thearchangel]

If we're being honest...

Those nine months feel like a dream on my end too. The good kind of dream - the ones in short supply back in the Milky Way.

[god the sap...]

[onebullet]

Says the guy who almost got turned into a pretty statue not too long ago

[thearchangel]

But that still turned out all right!

Eventually.

You know what I'm trying to say, come on.

[onebullet]

I'd say your habit of getting into trouble is as strong here as it was back home

[ Rocket to the face vs becoming a member of the crystal gems... yeah, it's fairly even. ]

But yes, it is nice not waking up worrying about everyone and everything being annihilated

I AM LOOKING ANYWAY

[thearchangel]

This time, though, I'm not making entire islands want to kill me. That has to count for something.

I'm fairly partial to waking up not worrying about that, yeah.

[onebullet]

Yet.

You've not made entire islands want to kill you yet

[thearchangel]

Well... I could work on that too, if you ever decide you're bored in retirement.